Dating trends that should die in 2019 and one to embrace!

Dating in the 21stcentury comes with its own language and most modern dating terms generally describe bad behaviour!

Dating can be tough and it would be much easier to ditch the bad dating behaviour.

This will revolutionise dating in 2019!

8 dating terms that should die and one to embrace in 2019!

1. Ghosting

Disappearing to avoid the awkward break up conversation by not texting or calling. Ghosting leaves too many questions and most singles prefer honesty to being  haunted by confusion. For tips for alternatives to ghosting – How to Break up with some with out ghosting.

2. Instagrandstanding

To Instagrand is to put a post on social media to get the attention of someone you like. Its all about using Instagram to see how many likes you can get from the person you fancy.

The solution is to get off social media and back to talking to people in real life. This is a much easier way to see if people actually likes you.

3.Benching

Happens when a person is not ‘into’ you enough to commit, but wants to keep you on the sidelines as an option. Think of a football game where a player is put on the bench while another person is in play. They will do the minimum to keep you around and you end up thinking that they wouldn’t do that if they weren’t into you.

Do not chose to accept being someone’s option.

4. Breadcrumbing

A breadcrumber gives you just enough attention to keep you around and keep the hope of a relationship alive. They leave you a trail of breadcrumbs (flirty messages) so you don’t forget about them! Think Hansel and Gretel!

It’s unhealthy and disrespectful, and the breadcrumber is only after your attention until they find their next source.

5. Cushioning

This is when the person is in a relationship and has a few people they are flirting and chatting to. The aim is to cushion the effects of a possible break-up so they won’t be alone!

This is a form of cheating, even if it is only in a small way. Don’t be someone’s cushion and remember people can only treat you how you allow them too.

6. Kittenfishing

Kittenfishing is about making yourself look better online.It could be using old photos where you looked better; lying about your age, weight, height or your job. The intention is to get a date. Kittenfishing doesn’t work as your date feels lied to and you will rarely get a second date.

It is time to be authentic online and offline.

7. Orbiting

An orbiter is a ghost you can see! They don’t talk to you but still follow you on social media. They keep you in their orbit, close enough to be seen but far enough away that they don’t have to talk to you. They ignore your messages/phone calls but still watch you on social media and like your posts.

It is a way of people keeping their options open in a small way. The easiest option is not to befriends with someone who is an ex. If you don’t want to unfriend them, then unfollow them so you can’t see them.  If you’re doing it to someone else, you’re only giving them hope you’re still interested.

8. Banksying

Banksying is ruining or self-sabotaging  your own relationship. This term is when you go into a relationship knowing it’s not going to work, maybe because you self-sabotage it, you are not ready but don’t want to be alone or trying to get over an ex.

Do yourself and everyone else a favour and don’t waste peoples time or play with their emotions when you are not ready or simply wanting to distract yourself.

Instead, Embrace Grande-ing

Finally, a healthy dating term you can embrace which doesn’t involve ignoring people or cheating.Grande-ing comes from Ariane Grande’s hit, Thank U, where she thanks her exes for helping her learn and grow. One taught her love, one taught her patience and one taught her pain. Grande-ing is about learning the lesson the person taught you and growing from it.  Even the most painful breakup can teach you something.  Maybe its to value yourself more, to teach you what you really want and make a better choose next time.  

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