Budgets and binges…
My history with money was very similar to my history with dieting!
To say I was a yo-yo dieter was a total understatement, you name a diet I’ve tried it, I mean I was pretty much a professional calorie counter.
I would start a diet, it would work for a while but then eventually the weight would start to come back on. I would get bored and then I would find myself a few months later, vowing to be better and restarting a new diet all over again … setting myself up to fail over and over and over again.
Even worse, I was repeating this same pattern with money and every other area in my life.
Feel shame about being a broke, research and start new fad money diet then after a few months of hard work have a nice fat bank account with plenty of money. Which triggered me to promptly celebrate by “binging” on clothes, cars, books etc.
Restrictive budgets are just like restrictive diets, designed to fail, never last and you end up in a worse place than you were to start with.
But … you only know what you know.
And I didn’t know any better, maybe you do. Maybe you’re great with money and maybe you have never had a toxic thought about food your entire life. But, I looked at the facts, I had these awful patterns in my life that I kept choosing to repeat over and over and over again.
Maybe it was what I was comfortable with, maybe I didn’t know any better. Or, maybe I blamed it all on my own “lack of willpower”.
Whatever it was, I knew, Now it was time to choose a different path.
Instead of changing the “action” a new diet or new saving plan … I decided to change my mindset and work on my relationship, not only with money but the food … and myself.
And, that’s where the magic happens.
I knew, through all my research on eating disorders and binge eating, that the only way to stop binge eating is to stop any diets. the restriction is the trigger for the binge.
I applied the same methods to my money. The minute I stopped living by everyone else’s “rules” around money and created an intuitive style budget, it was like the impulse to binge or spend just totally went away.
Knowing I could spend/eat whatever I truly desired helped me to remove feelings of shame guilt and fear from my finances and instead shifted my thinking towards “ there is always enough” (money and food.)
You see, often we think a problem in our life ( ie, our financial situation, our relationship, our food habits) are isolated. When in fact they are intertwined and connected with all areas of our life. After working on a money mindset with hundreds of women, I see the direct link between food relationships and money relationships all the time….
The good news is, life doesn’t have to be that way.
You can live a life that lights you up. A life free from guilt fear and shame around food/money. But you have to start demanding it for yourself. Start showing up for yourself, owning your awesomeness, and knowing exactly what you deserve.
- if you are experiencing a dysfunctional relationship with food, I suggest speaking to your health practitioner and seeking treatment with eating disorder psychologist.